another song i like

BY ELLIOT SMITH

Baby Britain feels the best
Floating over a sea of vodka
Separated from the rest
Fights problems with bigger problems
Sees the ocean fall and rise
Counts the waves that somehow didn't hit her
Water pouring from her eyes
Alcoholic and very bitter
For someone half as smart
You'd be a work of art
You put yourself apart
And I can't help until you start
We knocked another couple back
The dead soldiers lined up on the table
Still prepared for an attack
They didn't know they'd been disabled
Felt a wave, a rush of blood
You won't be happy 'til the bottle's broken
And you're out swimming in the flood
You kept back you kept unspoken
For someone half as smart
You'd be a work of art
You put yourself apart
And I can't help until you start
You got a look in your eye
When you're saying goodbye
Like you wanna say hi

The light was on but it was dim
Revolver's been turned over
And now it's ready once again
The radio was playing "crimson and clover"
London bridge is safe and sound
No matter what you keep repeating
Nothing's gonna drag me down
To a death that's not worth cheating
For someone half as smart
You'd be a work of art
You put yourself apart
I can't help until you start
For someone half as smart you'd be a work of art
You put yourself apart

NOV 14 2004!

This is one of thoes stupid surveys i used to do when i was bored.
I did this on nov 14 2004.
wtf.
pretty funny to me at least. thats almost 5 years ago!
im still a fucking nut.

name: Melissa
nickname(s): momo, mo, missy, molasses, magilla, mel
birthday: 9/9/84
where were you born:in a crack house, haha, i have no idea
zodiac sign: virgo
hair color: now:brown and blonde, nat: brownish blond
eye color: blue
shoe size: 8
ring size: maybe 7
skin type: white as fuck
blood type: hiv
siblings: 3
tattoos: none
piercing: 6
hobbies: dancing, and playing, and wrestling, thrifting, sewing, coloring, comic books, movies, music
color: red
food: italian
candy: most wonka candy, gobstoppers, the wax bottles, razzles, sixlets
pizza topping: pepperoni, and pretty much anything
salad dressing: 1000 island
cereal: fruity pebbles, cookie crisp
fruit: pineapple, melon, CHERRIES!
vegetable: olives. maybe?
berry: cherry
cake: icce cream cake, or confetti
movie:Willy Wonka
magazine: none
newspaper: none
tv show: rosanne
website: http://www.geocities.com/anti_liger_alliance/
radio station: none
cartoon character: Harry and Neil Hubert
cd: prince purple rain and Electric six and gravy train at the moment
song: At the moment, Double Decker supreeme
music group: Devo
music type: Metal, funny dance music, new wave
day of the week: frisat, friday night and sat combined into one big cahotic ruccas
month: june
season: summer
holiday: birthday
number: 9, and 18, and 6
phrase: "slide slide slippty slide", and "slice slice slikitty slice" and " FACED!"
store: scavengar hunt
weather: sunny, warm enough to be naked, but not sweaty, witha small breese
restaurant: dennys
channel: cartoons and nick at night
teacher: there are sooo many, ok, melissa perrino, mike engles, jim mattthis, brian spink, larry robberts, scott herstad, and i think thats all of em
weekend activity: kickin it wiith neil and all my home girls , and boys
hangout: none right now, maybe in forts
house color: as in what is my house color of what one is my fav. ill go with hot pink lime green and purple
sport to watch: WWF
sport to play: WWF
animal: Cats, squirrles, chipmunks, chinchillas, guinea pigs
flower: the kind made out of melted plasticy stuff that is all shiny
guy's name: Murdock, Lord, FRYLORD, Mcstinlestine
girl's name: Regan,
board game: candy land
story from childhood: rotten milk with old ma, bring left at a park
body part: wrist

have you ever
been on a train: yes
been on a plane: yes
been in a car accident: not really
caused a car accident:: all the time
run into a wall: yes
burned a potato chip: no
almost burned the house down: no
smoked: yea
been drunk: yea
broken the law: never
burned a cd: yes
frenched an animal: 3
had cyber sex: no
gotten engaged: no
had an online relationship: no
been rejected by a crush: not really
loved: i dont know
made yourself cry to get out of trouble: uh no
cried in public: yes
cried over a movie: yes
fallen asleep in a movie theater: no
given someone a bath: all the time
been to a boarding school: no
been home-schooled: no
lost a valuable item: yes, its called childhood
bungee jumped: no
skied: no
met the president: no
met a celebrity: yes
gotten a cavity: yes
shopped at abercrombie & fitch: with my mom and sister
made a prank call: lame-o
skipped school: yes
faked sick to get out of school: yes
purchased something that you knew didn't fit: yes
climbed a tree: yes
fallen from a tree: no, i have mad skills
broken a bone: just the tail bone
sprained anything: not that i remember
passed out: yep
made yourself pass out: yep
been to disney world: yep
been to a theme park (not disney): no
said i love you and meant it (not to a relative): yes, mostly to girls, and maybe a hanfull of boys
made a model volcano (working model): nope
made a clover leaf with your tounge: no

past
what did you do yesterday: kicked it with the best peoplei n the world
memory you miss the most: being loved
memory you want to forget: child hood and pretty much most negative family situations, and bad relationships
something you regretted after it was done: pretty much eveything that happend sice the october of freshman year until about 2 months ago

the last
song you heard: sippin on gin and juice, laaaaid back
cd you bought: Prince, purple rain
thing you said: bye
time you cried: last week
movie seen in a theater: i heart huckabees
thing you ate: sub
person who called: Becky
nail polish shade worn: pink
time you showered: yesterday at 8 15
person who complimented you: Im going to say Lindsay

at this moment
what are you listening to: my keys go clackity clak clackity
what are you wearing: work suit
what are you thinking: i am bored and want to dance
what are you scared of most: being alone, dark, my future,
how many people are on your buddy list: a gazzillion

future
occupation: teacher of awesomeness or side show girl, contortionist
marriage site: vegas
honeymoon: somewhere warm
place to live: somewhere warm, in a trailor park
kids: one boy, complete w/ eyepatch
car: a monster truck, and a collection of sweet 50s cars
what are you doing tomorrow: school, work
heaven: hells no
hell: no
angels: no
devil: no
god: no
buddha: no
aliens: ythey are all over
ghosts: yes
spirit(soul): not so much
soulmates: maybe
love at first sight: maybe like at first sight
love in general: i dont know
luck: yes
yourself: hahaha yeah

crush
who and when was your first crush: kindergarden, Alf
a celebrity crush: Alf, mr. cosby, Dan Connar, Micheal Ian Black, Milla, Uma
who do you want to be with right now: Alf
whos number do you want: Alf
what is something you dont understand about the opposite sex: why they are a little freaked out about golden showers, and why some guys hate soap in their penis, and some guys just shove that soar right up in there and TURN it
if you could go on a date with anybody, who would it be: Andrew WK
on a scale of one to ten, how romantic are you: -100000000000000000
first thing noticed about the opposite sex: big warm fuzzy blue sweaters
what do you look for personality-wise: not too abusive, nice and funny and creative, and a little bit crazy
biggest turn on: having some squish and being on top and third rounds, brises, scratches, showers, smells, being funny, being comforting, being crazy
biggest turn off: not doing the above and being cranky, and smelly ness, but only on occasion
something they wear that turns you on: um naked, pretty much anything, big warm fuzzy blue sweaters and also red hoodies, tight pants, docs, wife beathers and suspenders
something they wear that turns you off: um big shirts w/ huge hols in the arms
the most romantic thing you want to happen to you: um be hit in the face with a shoe. HAHA. um, i dunno. get married, live in a trailor park, own my own 50s stlye restarunt, and have my hot rockabilly husband work on cars, then bowl with me, and then make sex all night.
the most romantic thing that has happened to you: mybe not romantic, but nice, having a boy take me home and and let me sleep in his bed w/o dry humping me , making me a dvo stencil thats 3 layers and not putting out for it
what do you wear on a coffee date: i dont
is it right to flirt if you're taken: i dont know i dont worry about these things
is cyber cheating: no, its just lame
are eyes the passegeway to the soul: perhaps?
do you want to hug somebody right now: i always want to hug people

one or the other
coke/pepsi:Coke
sprite/7-up: no
boxers/briefs: panties
gold/silver: silver
vanilla/chocolate: chocolate
flowers/candy: candy
book/magazine: magazine
tv/radio: tv
glass half empty/half full: half empty
colored pencils/markers: markers
coffee/tea: both
sun/moon: sun because its warm, but the moon is cheese
day/night: night
hot/cold: hot
dog/cat: cat
button/zipper: zipper
cotton/feather pillow: feathered
blue/purple: purple
plumber/trashman: plumber
jeans/shorts: jeans
long distance relationship/none: none
mechanical/regular pencil: regular
that 70's show/simpsons: simpsons
kelso/eric: ???
donna/jackie: ???
bart/lisa: bart
romeo/juliet: no
romantic comedy/thriller: i like the song thriller
nsync/bsb: lame-o
peanut butter/jelly: jelly
waffles/pancakes: waffles
letter/email: letter
florida/california: california
pizza/burgers: PIZZZZA
hat/visor: hat
football/rugby: rugby
iceskating/blading: blading
movie at home/in theater: theater

are you
happy: no
sad: no
religious: hell no
bitchy: like a wildabeast
crazy: hahaha INSANE
messy: maybe
mad: haha
slacker: maybe
nerd: YEAH
bookworm: not so much
jock: strap
preppy: no
selfish: not normaly
giving: usualy
obsessive: yep
violent: Insanely
calm: not so much
peaceful: no
mellow: no
eccentric: rarely
caring: for thoes who i beleive deserve it
untrustworthy: no
loyal: only to thoes who deserve it
patriotic: not at all
perverted: WAYtoo perverted for a nice girl like me
colorful: yes i am a fucking rainbow
artistic: no

miscellanoues
what color is your jacket: i have several jakcets
what color is your razor: blade/green silver black
what size is your bed: twin
what color crayon would you be: magenta
what are the last four digits of you phone number: 3908
feelings on abortion: its my anti drug, and you know how i roll
how long does it take you to shower: until i think i am clean
what does your screenname mean: its my name backward with some numers and random crap
who do you trust the most: my homegirls i guess
is cussing a necessity in life: rap
how about coffee: yes
is the world screwed: meyes
what something you cant live without: good dirty dance and rap music, a week w/o sex or at least touch
what time did you fall asleep:i dont know
know what 69 means: yes
can you live without a microwave: yes
what do think about death: well i know i will die
where and when do you want to be married: when its right
do you want to drop out of school: sometimes
why is the sky blue: because its saweet
what is a good trait about yourself: im the wu of bitches
what do you always think about: my future
do you talk to yourself: pretty much yeah
what is your opinion on love: I dont know if its real but oi dont care because i like what i got
can you afford to lose weight: Yes
what color would you dye your hair: black
best thing anyones told you:"take your zoloft" haha
what is your reaction to someone telling you you're hot: uh, ok, if you think so sweet, and i am like, woohoo someone thinks im hot, do a lil dance
if you wrote a book, what would it be about:the life i wish i lived
what would you change your name to: Genene, Lola
longest crush lasted how long: i dont know
time finished: 4:10;46 pm

run away

oh well ok

never

Im going to an indoor water park this weekend.
Im going to push little kids out of my way .
i like this song

The sun comes up another day begins
And I don't even worry about the state I'm in
Head so heavy and I'm looking thin
But when the sun goes down I wanna start again

You never understandin'
You never understand me
Yeah

Don't turn around until you look at me
Why don't you take a second and tell me what you see
Things I see you only disagree
You never understand that's what I want to be

You never understandin'
You never understand me
Yeah

Not wishing to hide but you just can't see me
I tell you the truth but you don't believe me
Thinking of love but I can't hear what you're saying
Tomorrow I'm leaving
Cause I'm not understanding you


you should listen to it real loud, its the best

vicks vapor rub

im in love with illusion

so saw me in half.

just stuff.

Lets see, its Monday.
Yesterday was Sunday and i slept all day because I just couldn't muster up anything to do. Id try, but id fail. So I did some dishes. Watched some Seinfeld. But some how when i was watching the feld my DVD player came unplugged, and my remote is broken so if i i wanted to start at episode 3 again id have to watch one and two all over because the DVD player itself has no skip buttons, who would do that!? So i got pissed off and slept on my couch in spite of the DVD player, and besides, i just couldn't do anything for the life of me. I called my mom earlier and she said she felt the same way too. So i didn't feel so bad. I eventually switched my schedule at GVSU for the winter semester so i didn't have 3 Eng classes. Anyhow I had a dream I was in my home town and I was driving cars that would drive themselves, but not in a good way. I woke up around 9 and went over to Adam's to cut some hairs, but Rubin had to cancel because he wanted to see 007, but i cut Adams hair later. i also got some checkers, witch is the only food i have ate that didn't come out of a can in about 2 days now. lots of corn from a can lately. Then at around 1 am i moseyed on over to my place that was about 50degrees at this point and I started watching some stupid TV, and getting music off an external hard drive and onto my computer. So round about 4am I decided Id try to sleep, but i had this uneasy feeling that if i left my room I would see demons ( from watching that damn ghost show "A Haunting" way too much) So every time i had to pee i ran to the bathroom trying not to look down the hall. yeah, i am a huge dork. Then i just laid in bed with my hands all clammy because i was just so nervous about these demons. Then at 6am the damn radiator in my bathroom starts going off. Its starts with a series of loud thuds, like someone is hitting it with a hammer, and the only someone i can imagine doing that is that fucking demon. Then the radiator sounds as if its breaking off the wall and turning into some sort or radiator spider that will kill all in its path with a silk string of steam. And of course NOW i have to pee again, oh man, i HAVE to face it, i feel like Kevin in home alone going down stairs to THAT monster. I go in un-armed and do my business, it hisses at me a little and threatens me with its loud thuds, I kick it with my heal and then run back to bed. Still having no real sleep i try to bundle up burrito style, the best there is turn Seinfeld back on and finally get a little peace, until 7 when the radiator is on a rage again. Oh c'mon. So i dig deeper into this blanket burrito and finally get some sort of sleep while the sun is coming out. Because everyone knows it finally safe to sleep when the sun starts peeking out. So here i am still tired, a little hungry, and i have to shower and goto work.
the end

compton kids

My friend at work once told me my fashion was like Compton, but more like Compton kids
these are the Compton kids,

It hasn't even started and I hate it already.

Winter,
You make me want to run away. You make everyone sad because you eat up all the sunlight and make us all cold. You make me lazy because i have to bundle under 2 huge blankets just so i dont freeze my face off. Your a jerk and you never know when to leave. yeah sometimes your kinda pretty, but sometimes your snow and ice on the road, and you kill people. Sometimes you make a 2 inch sheet of ice over my wind shield that takes at least 20 min to break off. You make snot freeze under peoples nostrils, but i'll let that go its kinda funny. Oh and i like it when i see some ass hole fall and slip on ice, but i cant ever laugh until I know they are ok, and by that time its not funny anymore, unless you think of it the next day. Sometimes I slip and fall and thats kinda funny, unless it hurts way too much. One time your freezing gust of wind slammed my car door into my face, you ass hole, that really hurt. Oh and that slushy stuff is so gross when im just trying to wear some 1/2 normal shoes and you seep that dirty piss slush into MY shoes. Sick. Then it get on the bottom of my pant legs. Then by the 2nd month you have been around everyone i know seems to be going wacky because we have all been cooped up in our homes, with no light. Every ones skin is all flaky and dry and peeling off, leaving dead skin flakes all over. Winter your just so gross. ill have to vacuum twice as much now. Plus wake up earlier to get to work or school on time. Well your coming and i cant stop you. But I just wanted to tell you that your an ass hole. but sometimes pretty.

oh werd?

So I talked to my mom and she said. OK. She said she was proud of my decision. Pretty nuts. I was real surprised. So now Im going back to school at Grand Valley. I just have to get some loans and financial aid and get some classes. Yeah Im pretty f-ing excited.

This is it.

Today I was sitting at my dead end job at directions in research and I just wanted to leave. I mean, yes, its a job, an easy, decent paying job that I am lucky to have considering how hard it is to even have a job in MI. I was just thinking for the millionth time, what am I doing with my life? Not just now, but where do I expect to get working this job.
I thought about why I am not doing hair. Current reason is that my last job as stylist didn't pay well. And then I thought even if i did get a nice job in a salon, Its hard to have any benefits as a stylist, and once you loose any good looks you may have had your considered washed up. I mean I do enjoy doing hair, but i feel like I was meant to do something a little more rewarding.
As some may know I did go to Grand Valley for 2 years already and I was leaning toward education. Ever since I was little I wanted to be an artist, obviously that plan went no where. But my second choice was writing or education. So I wanted to be a language arts teacher and that's what i was going to school for at Grand Valley for for 2 years. After being out of school for going on almost 3 years I have decided its time to go back. I wouldn't say I have wasted the past 3 years I just really found out what I DON'T want to do, and that is work a dead end job with no hope for my future. I want to go back to school and do what I wanted to do in the first place. I realize this will mean never ending debt for the rest of my life, and that there is NO guarantee that I will get a job as a teacher. BUT whats the worst case scenario? I end up right where I am now.
So I have to talk to my parents about this. And I am almost positive the response wil be something around the lines of "Well your cousin went to school to be a lawyer and now she works at red lobster" and I will say something around the lines of " Well in all honesty I dont see how going back to school is going to be a negative choise" and Im sure my parents will be pissed of and think Im making the wrong decisn. But I am not going to wonder the rest of my life what I could have done.

What do you think?

stress

i hate stress. it ruins everything. and its all just one big circle that makes it almost impossible to break out of.
i just want it all to wipe away and be able to have things be new again.
and no matter how hard im trying. the stress and tension is kicking my ass.

fuck you stress, go eat a turd burger.

I want my life back and i want to be happy.

doooooooooddddyyy...doodles

dream

i just woke up from a dream,JUST did.
In my dream my car was towed, but it wasn't supposed to be, there was no place to park so the person i was with parked it anyways . So i go inside the store we were in and ask one of the ugly employees if they had watched it get towed. and the bitch said yes. Then this mammoth of an old hag lady started yelling at me "you shouldn't have parked there" so i go fucking nuts, "excuse me?EXCUSE ME!" i didnt remember most of the dialog until i made fun of her being old, and dressing like an idiot, then she said butt hole and i said,"BUTT HOLE! , BUTT HOLE? I HOPE A LOT OF SHIT COMES OUT YOUR BUTT HOLE! A BUTT PLUG OF MAGGOTS COMES OUT YOUR BUTT HOLE! " everyone in the store was disgusted and i left the store laughing like an insane person.
i just had to write it down.

everyday

sometimes i feel like no matter what choice i make it will always be the wrong choice.
Maybe is my punishment for being a weird child.
I really don't know.
All I know is that you have to deal with the consequences of anything you do.
I feel like sometimes things just get so wrong that there is no way to make them right, because every time you try to make it right, your just making it even more wrong.
I find myself in the same places sometimes asking the same questions, and you think that it would be easier to make choices that you have already made and already know the consequences.
But its harder.
of course.
everyday.
i feel like my choices are harder.
sometimes i think i should just let things be, since i rarely do that, and maybe, just maybe this time the outcome will be good, but i really feel it will all just blow up in my face (the dutch oven effect).
I have a hard time not having goals, and not thinking about whats next.
Thats just how i am and always will be.
I need organization and something stable to be able to rest my mind.
But the something stable is the hardest thing, because i guess i contradict myself there, because if i were to introduce a constant to my equation i will be safe there, but i will also be extremely bored and i cant handle that. I also need change so my boredom wont eat me alive.
I feel like as soon as i was done with school, all the personality traits i liked about myself were lost in the transition.
but a lot of bad traits too.
I just feel like the only thing i can ever say lately is "i dont know".
And for someone who needs to know to be happy this is not good.
i feel like i am going to either run far far away , or try to set up something stable.
because i cant just be in the middle i cant
i never have been in the middle.

juan 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ton

haha.
Slept till 2 woke up.
guy fixed my oven.
i played on computer.
went to work, didnt have a mountain dew but was going nuts anyways.
Drew a picture from a picture on a book and was making the pictures look at each other and scream and greg told me to stop like i was in trouble or something, but i was laughing so hard i was crying, Adnan was lookin at me like i was fucking wacky. Then i threw paper at juan and kept saying " on a juan to ton scale" i didnt mean to make him mad. Juan is funny.
Then i played hangman with andrea and my phrase was " hamburgers and hotdogs too i want to have a bbq" it was pretty funny.

Now im back home.
I cut adams hair like a mullet, with short sideburns and all.

The other day i talked to one of my bestest friends ever, brian roys, hes pretty much one of the most interesting people anywhere. hes out traeling the world. he is a park ranger. thats really cool.he has 3 guns and some cool outfits.

josh was sick at work today:(
he had some nasty throat shit.
that made him sad, so i drew him a picture of me saying'get well' or die.
josh is a supervisor at work wh is funny hes nice topeople even if he hates them all .
AND he told me about this jem..

yep he knows what i like in a film hahaha.

fall

seriously i love this weather.
i love fall.
i love how my living room looks with thi perfect amount of light at 6pm on a sunday afternoon
I also love that final destination 1 and 2 are on tnt, i havnt seen 3 yet, but maybe it will be on next. also idle hands is another fall favorite of mine.

old personal fav

This is a picture i drew of myself eating my baby. I got the idea from watching the grizzly man which is a movie about this guy who lives in the wild with some bears, the bears go ape shit and one of the bears, named Melissa starts eating her babies, so this is me eating a baby. Oh and in the end of the movie one of the bears (maybe melissa bear, maybe not) eats the guy. opps..

hehe

song about old

You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress
Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness
Landed in a very common crisis
Everything's in order in a black hole
Nothing seems as pretty as the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking a Tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?

Oh that boy's a slag
The best you ever had
The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Not as daft as they seem
Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up...

Flicking through a little book of sex tips
Remember when the boys were all electric?
Now when she tells she's gonna get it
I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget i
Clinging to not getting sentimental
Said she wasn't going but she went still
Likes her gentlemen to not be gentle
Was it a Mecca dabber or a betting pencil?

Oh that boy's a slag
The best you ever had

The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Weren't as daft as they seem
Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up
Oh, where did you go?
Where did you go?
Where did you go? Woah.

Falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane
You just sounded it out
You're not coming back again.

Falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane
You just sounded it out
You're not coming back again.

You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress
Started all the naughty nights with niceness
Landed in a very common crisis
Everything's in order in a black hole
Everything was pretty in the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking in tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?

to nick

hahaha

this is my favorite video EVER.
Also I had a bowl cut from 1-4 grade. Ill post some pics of it.
Although the bow cut grew out people thought I was a boy until about 7th grade.
and sometimes now.

Why does my apartment smell like farts!?

Went to work.
All I had to eat so far today was 2 bites of fish and 2 pieces of fried mac and cheese from wing heaven.
I went to work and started to draw a picture for shauna , which i will post on here.
I basically drew that, then talked to my friend lindsay who im most likely going to move in with in a while about this sweet apartment, then Juan sat by me and i gave him the pic i drew for him last night. I left at ten because i was only scheduled till 10 and i was fucking starving so I went to Meijer and got some food. I also got these wacky tights, which I will als post a picture of. Oh and today I pulled out (thats what she said) some old favorites, my steel toe oxblood docs. Yeah. a picture for thoes too. Just full of pics today.
the docs

a pic i drew for adam
wacky tights
for shauna
and for juan
Yep.
So about living with my friend Lindsay. Shes been a friend for a long time now but we lost touch after grand Valley and now we work together at DIR. But anyhow it will be her,me and her friend iesha(I-E-SHA) and we all currently have boyfriends named adam, pretty odd, huh?
But the thing is I dont want to break my lease so I have to wait to move in, but they are getting the place soon, then whne i can move in I will move in. the place were looking at is on James st right by wealthy, walking distance to mean while, its $795 ALL UTILITIES included!!! yeah. it will be NICE! It has an f-ing fire place!! AND free laundry. Im pretty excited.

Seriously my apartment smells like farts real bad right now. and i dont feel like cleaning. I just cleaned the whole place on sat, like all fucking day and now it smells like farts, the sink is full of dishes, theres just random stuff all over, undies, socks, its nutz-o.

Im now watching Freddy got fingered again. Tom greens dad(in this movie) reminds me of my mom. The whole movie reminds me of growing up in my house. how i always wanted to eat fast food. and how i would do stupid shit all the time like make my belly button talk at the dinner table, or just do anything and my mom would go nuts about it. Its just funny. or how id laugh to myself about stuff i was thinking and my mom thought i was retarded. uh now that i live alone i can say honestly im not retarded but there definitely is a few screws loose. What im trying to say is I really am crazy. im surprised i can live on my own, and havent ended up in the hospital.

Tonight is the first night i feel tired at this time.

I feel like I am just putting my life on pause.
Im just working a job that has nothing to do with hair so I can pay by bills and barely get by.
And I work 6-7 days a week, and cant even afford to buy some fucking groceries.
But I CANT COMPLAIN.
Thats just life.
Even if Im in a bad mood, at least I have a job, and an apartment, and most things I want, and a pretty great boy who buys me milkshakes or malts.
OH and some of the best fucking scumbags ever who can always make me laugh my ass off.
Anyhow.
I guess Im just feeling weird because my usual schedule is becoming very LAZY.
I wake up at about 2:30-3pm. I then sit on the couch. I maybe eat some food if its available. Then I shower, put on clothes and go to work. Drive to work from 4:30-5 and usually listen to my ipod but its broken AGAIN..So I have one cd to listen to that Adam made for me almost a year ago. Then I walk into DIR , push my way through a crowd of people some of which smell real stinky, then i find my desk and I set my stuff down , then i wander around for about 10 min . Then at about 510-515 i actually start dialing. Then i sit at my little desk drawing or writing. Take some surveys with people who can be rather idiotic. Loose faith in most humanity. I do that until 1155. Then I clock out. Drive home with same cd. Get home and I am hungry s I find the food that is in the cubbard like a can of pees, and i eat that. Then i stay up until 4am doing random stuff.

I guess I am just down because I sleep more than Im awake. I talk to idiots on the phone, more than my friends. And I am making NO progress in the hair industry, but cant realy do much about it because i need to get paid. At least I have done some hair on the side so i dont go insane.
Well its time to take that shower.

My First Blog

I now am the owner of a newborn blog.
Lets see.
I will maybe type about wacky stuff I do for about 2 weeks, forget I have it and never return to it, much like my first pet or child.
Or just write embarrassing stuff about adam.
Lets see.
Today I woke up at 2:40 pm.
Then i sat on my couch that was free and the middle cushion is always sunk in.
I picked up adam and ate tacos.
Went to work.
Adnan ( a kid at work) watched me completely fuck up at parking and not give a shit. It was pretty hilarious.
Kim said "girl that outfit is the shit" she always says she likes my outfit and my hair.
I wore a batman shirt and a purple striped tank under it, some black skinny jeans and yellow pointed flats.
Did survey with people in North Carolina.
Said the fuck word way too much.
Thought my tummy was going to explode,, or like there were worms digging through mud in there. I dont know.
Had some sharp abdominal pains and a few in my lower back.
Ate some nuts.
Came home.
tried to park for about 10 min.
Ate some microwaved left over fries from checkers. Its good for me.
Then I wanted to watch tv, but never did. Oh well.
I have been drawing a lot at work lately.
It helps pass time I guess.
Heres some pics I drew at work for my friend Scott. Hes a real artist. Im not but it was his birthday. So I made my efforts to show him I like him as a friend. For my b-day he drew me a SICK picture of flapjack and Knuckles. I should post that!